//////////Your vacation is over and now you have to deal with life!
The life of a rookie parent. You get caught up in the life of the PTA. They say, it helps your kid value education. Well, if you only have one kid you can't really leave it to chance can you? If you are a stay at home mom you can't really justify not being involved. But if this is your first, and worse yet, your only, this is your only chance!
I have a problem with saying no. I have read the books. I could give you and anyone else a lecture on boundaries. Can I institute such things in my life? Maybe, but most likely not.
I have volunteered in the classroom. It really is perfect for knowing the whose, whats, and whys of your child's education. But here are some warnings....
If possible, be the co-room mom (unless your are a control freak)
Choose opportunities, as my sister advised, "offer the most reward for the least effort"
Don't assume because someone has a kid they are normal
Always know your boundaries and volunteer for things you enjoy
Don't get me wrong...being a volunteer is very important to you and your kid. If you want to maintain that as a mother you are " omniscient all knowing" then you had better do your homework.
I unwittingly volunteered for the day after Halloween.....ROOKIE MISTAKE! But then again, that can buy you time off. I know I had taken a while to recover! It really is amazing to see what happens. I thought the crazy behavior was all a myth or Hollywood....WRONG! There were kids writhing on the floor, kids with candy hangovers, kids spinning in circles on the floor, Sugar is a powerful drug! God help those poor teachers! There has got to be a special place in heaven for those teachers. I believe it will be filled with silence!
I also got recruited to the Daddy Daughter Dance. I guess this is a big deal. I know my husbands's goal is to arrive late and leave early. But I now understand that this is like a Prom?!
I never took a prom seriously in my life! I guess this puts me at a disadvantage. But the key to being successful in such a situation is to do what you are good and passionate at and it can be a success.
I guess child rearing is not only about rearing a decent kid. Equipped to deal with life's idiosyncrasies, but dealing with your own. If you cannot model it, you cant teach it.
No one tells ya about how hard it will be, how intimidating, how raw this experience is. It is just like they say "misery enjoys company". Being a parent is the hardest thing you will do. It is the biggest challenge that you will personally face, and the biggest challenge your relationship will face. Those who are in it, will not give you the details until you have made that blood pact. Even after you have...I cannot guarantee they will let you know it all until the situation comes. I believe some of it comes from the grace of God that you just don't remember and some of it comes from some secret society. B.S..
My sister gave me the best advice, get a moms group right away. She was right. Because it takes a village not to LOOSE YOUR MIND! She also said, get friends with older kids for another perspective. You know the friends with kids that you enjoy seeing and YOU KNOW THOSE WITH KIDS YOU TALK ABOUT....choose wisely who you seek for advice. Parenting is about finding your way and humbling yourself to learn.
Having and raising a kid is a blur. It is like naked and afraid and you would not have signed up had you known. But still, the reward is great. You need to raise a decent kid to make a difference. You also have a kid to realize how right your folks were and develop a new sense of respect, forgiveness and healing with in your own mom and dad relationship.
Life is full of "I will never do that", "I cant believe" ....but until you have walked a mile in their shoes.
Parenting is the hardest and most important thing you will do. It will fill your heart with the most love you can imagine, break you heart like never before, instill fear and insecurities you never imagined, and develop the most amazing relationships you never thought possible,
Go forth, be brave, make mistakes, be willing to admit you are wrong. It is ok! The hardest part is to enjoy the trials, treasure the moments and believe this is your calling and it will be ok!
From my lips to Gods Ears!!!!
Friday, January 4, 2019
NOT ALL SOAPBOX AND POSITIVE CRAP!
As most of you know, I have my moments of epiphany, but I am also one with a crazy story. I think as time has progressed my story telling has gotten less thrilling. I Promise there will be more stories to come. Stories that will make you laugh or you will realize I need some serious prayer!
Coming soon!
Coming soon!
The New Year Is Here!
The New Year is Here!
The Holidays have finally passed, and a new year is already here. There are so many places I could go with this topic i.e
Why we should create a new type of calendar
Prepping for the holidays
New Year's Resolutions
Is there a reason I only had one child?
Should I really have as many pets as I do (as I listen to the clanking of something a dog has drug out of the trash, while I was putting the child to bed)?
Should I be more organized? Find a place to keep my glasses and phone, to prevent frustration and madness?
But instead I will just tell you what comes to mind/ Otherwise I will not be posting for another month.
I love the holidays! I love the decorating, the giving, the baking, the parties, the school holidays! I love and hate them all!
But when they end.....don't you wish they never did? It is like, life revs up again with no chance of slowing down. It is a wonderful time which we should slow down and enjoy.
Life I guess is nothing but a conundrum. We need to enjoy things as they happen; otherwise you miss it all. I find myself often troubled when my kid focuses on what she did not get, what she does not have, what did not go her way.....Suck it up buttercup or you are going to miss what is happening right now! I believe this is a lesson for us all. Didn't Ferris Bueller say it best..."Life moves fast, If your don't slow down once in a while you are going to miss it!"
How often do we plan and imagine perfection, then find ourselves focusing on these things, rather than living our lives and being present. I can't say this is a skill I have perfected, nor do I believe I ever will. It should become a mantra.
I intended to take cookies to the neighbors, like last year. I planned to paint special gifts for the family, I expected to move the elves every night. I wanted Christmas lights and decor galore, get my after Christmas shopping done to get a jump on the next year. I intended to tour neighborhoods with lights with my child, go to six flags and hike part of the Appalachian trail.
Instead, I made party mix, I gave my folks the things I had painted, told my kid the elves were ditsy and forgot where they had hidden last, decorated my porch, my house decor was great and even went up early (including the manger scene from my childhood). got my basement ready for a new years party, and got my house clean enough that my auto-immune deficient mother could finally stay with us with out dying. I missed six flags due to rain as well as the hiking. Oh yeah and my six year old has utilized her investigative skills to determine santa is not real.....UGH!
I also thought now that the child was down, the husband is away I could write this blog uninterrupted....but this is the 4th time I have had to get up and take a can of cat food away from a dog.....gawd (in Napoleon dynamite voice).
So Lets just keep with what we have here and break it down:
My holiday season was wonderful. It was not how I had imagined. It did not play out as it had in the past, but some really great things did happen.
I did not make cookies for the neighborhood. My lack of motivation may be discussed at another time.
I did get the front of my house decorated and I did take my daughter on some exciting Christmas light hunts. Of course, I was asked why does our house not look so pretty? Why does our neighborhood not have the same Christmas spirit? Now you will say my response was a bit harsh but...I did not want to commit to joining the few brave souls who graciously decorate their homes. I said "This way we can enjoy what others have done to share the season and its spirit. Some people enjoy doing such decorating, it is time staking and a labor of love. We will enjoy the Christmas spirit and give thanks for those who do such wonderful things. It is a great deal of work and expense. We are not the kinds of people who can produce such wonderful decor outside our homes, because we most likely will be offering our decor year round and that is frowned upon. Instead we appreciate what the others offer and then decorated how we are able." I really hope to have Christmas cards next year to put in every one of the fabulous people's mailboxes thanking those who selflessly give us joy with their lights.
I actually got my Christmas tree up and decorated the day after thanks giving. I was able to display the creche that my parents have had since I can remember. Of course, I had always planned to refurbish it to its fabulousness...but maybe another time (along with reading the book in its entirety the gave me such an idea). I remember it being one of my favorite things. I would play with it and admire it. My child did the same. Barbie and the Hello Kitty food truck came by. A coca cola refrigerator was installed for the tired and thirsty wise men and shepherd. Jesus lost his head as well as some angels lost their wings. Many other visitors came to see the miracle of Jesus our Lord.
I did downsize Christmas in the house. I tried to be inspired by my minimalist friend who said (I paraphrase) keep what you love versus allowing the Christmas boxes to vomit over your house. I tried to be adult. Ya know what, I liked it!
My hubby and I worked hard to get the place ready for the visit of his parents for thanksgiving, then took it to the next level of getting the house allergen reduced for my parents arrival for Christmas. Sure, my mother might have broken a rib, but she did not have an asthma attack!
Along with our endeavors we purged may things in the basement, allowing for a game room downstairs and the beginnings of a new workshop in the basement.
So all in all, it might not have been the original vision, but at a certain point you have to determine your priorities and what is necessary and go from there.
We did it. A successful holiday season! We hosted Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years here. The first trifecta since I can remember!
Now may the crazy begin! You don't even want to know what is going to happen....But I think you will!
The Holidays have finally passed, and a new year is already here. There are so many places I could go with this topic i.e
Why we should create a new type of calendar
Prepping for the holidays
New Year's Resolutions
Is there a reason I only had one child?
Should I really have as many pets as I do (as I listen to the clanking of something a dog has drug out of the trash, while I was putting the child to bed)?
Should I be more organized? Find a place to keep my glasses and phone, to prevent frustration and madness?
But instead I will just tell you what comes to mind/ Otherwise I will not be posting for another month.
I love the holidays! I love the decorating, the giving, the baking, the parties, the school holidays! I love and hate them all!
But when they end.....don't you wish they never did? It is like, life revs up again with no chance of slowing down. It is a wonderful time which we should slow down and enjoy.
Life I guess is nothing but a conundrum. We need to enjoy things as they happen; otherwise you miss it all. I find myself often troubled when my kid focuses on what she did not get, what she does not have, what did not go her way.....Suck it up buttercup or you are going to miss what is happening right now! I believe this is a lesson for us all. Didn't Ferris Bueller say it best..."Life moves fast, If your don't slow down once in a while you are going to miss it!"
How often do we plan and imagine perfection, then find ourselves focusing on these things, rather than living our lives and being present. I can't say this is a skill I have perfected, nor do I believe I ever will. It should become a mantra.
I intended to take cookies to the neighbors, like last year. I planned to paint special gifts for the family, I expected to move the elves every night. I wanted Christmas lights and decor galore, get my after Christmas shopping done to get a jump on the next year. I intended to tour neighborhoods with lights with my child, go to six flags and hike part of the Appalachian trail.
Instead, I made party mix, I gave my folks the things I had painted, told my kid the elves were ditsy and forgot where they had hidden last, decorated my porch, my house decor was great and even went up early (including the manger scene from my childhood). got my basement ready for a new years party, and got my house clean enough that my auto-immune deficient mother could finally stay with us with out dying. I missed six flags due to rain as well as the hiking. Oh yeah and my six year old has utilized her investigative skills to determine santa is not real.....UGH!
I also thought now that the child was down, the husband is away I could write this blog uninterrupted....but this is the 4th time I have had to get up and take a can of cat food away from a dog.....gawd (in Napoleon dynamite voice).
So Lets just keep with what we have here and break it down:
My holiday season was wonderful. It was not how I had imagined. It did not play out as it had in the past, but some really great things did happen.
I did not make cookies for the neighborhood. My lack of motivation may be discussed at another time.
I did get the front of my house decorated and I did take my daughter on some exciting Christmas light hunts. Of course, I was asked why does our house not look so pretty? Why does our neighborhood not have the same Christmas spirit? Now you will say my response was a bit harsh but...I did not want to commit to joining the few brave souls who graciously decorate their homes. I said "This way we can enjoy what others have done to share the season and its spirit. Some people enjoy doing such decorating, it is time staking and a labor of love. We will enjoy the Christmas spirit and give thanks for those who do such wonderful things. It is a great deal of work and expense. We are not the kinds of people who can produce such wonderful decor outside our homes, because we most likely will be offering our decor year round and that is frowned upon. Instead we appreciate what the others offer and then decorated how we are able." I really hope to have Christmas cards next year to put in every one of the fabulous people's mailboxes thanking those who selflessly give us joy with their lights.
I actually got my Christmas tree up and decorated the day after thanks giving. I was able to display the creche that my parents have had since I can remember. Of course, I had always planned to refurbish it to its fabulousness...but maybe another time (along with reading the book in its entirety the gave me such an idea). I remember it being one of my favorite things. I would play with it and admire it. My child did the same. Barbie and the Hello Kitty food truck came by. A coca cola refrigerator was installed for the tired and thirsty wise men and shepherd. Jesus lost his head as well as some angels lost their wings. Many other visitors came to see the miracle of Jesus our Lord.
I did downsize Christmas in the house. I tried to be inspired by my minimalist friend who said (I paraphrase) keep what you love versus allowing the Christmas boxes to vomit over your house. I tried to be adult. Ya know what, I liked it!
My hubby and I worked hard to get the place ready for the visit of his parents for thanksgiving, then took it to the next level of getting the house allergen reduced for my parents arrival for Christmas. Sure, my mother might have broken a rib, but she did not have an asthma attack!
Along with our endeavors we purged may things in the basement, allowing for a game room downstairs and the beginnings of a new workshop in the basement.
So all in all, it might not have been the original vision, but at a certain point you have to determine your priorities and what is necessary and go from there.
We did it. A successful holiday season! We hosted Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years here. The first trifecta since I can remember!
Now may the crazy begin! You don't even want to know what is going to happen....But I think you will!
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